The Car Crash analytical analysis... and my Leg-wagon :2006 , 2.5i

damn, old age in full effect, .. ehm, " clearing throat"...i seem to have forgotten all the gist i was saving,.Ahah..i haf remembad.

Title: car crashing into building, and my Leg-Wagon: 2006 , 2.5i

..okay its, 7.30 am toyin-t, is casually walking to skool, i see my neighbour aka kem(not reall name..ofcourse!) running like a really mad person towards me..toyin-t .(for a second i wanted to run too, its lagos mentality, when someone is runnin, u also run, then ask questions later..haha)

kem finally catches up, and asks me.."did you see what just happen?"
, i say no, then she starts screamin, "I am goin to jail, ..I am goin to jail.. I am going to JAIL. ..Please take care of my kids..

..kids kini/what!, what is the woman talking about, abi she smoked something, anyway she pulls me to the other side of the road and i see her car crashed into one of my school's apartment buildings (..if she wasn't hysterical, this was infact a very comical sight)
.
.so i asked , hmnnn how did this happen. kem replied..i was backin out/reverseing out of the driveway and the car wouldn't stop.

...me toyin-t, was very doubtful about kem's official story
okay let me give you a mental picture,
so she backed out reversing from her driveway into the main highway,... then the car did not stop, and crossed over to the other side of the road, this car then continued moving.
hmm there is a huge hill separating my skool from the road. so kems car backed "UP " a hill , then backed"DOWN'' the hill, the fell into the parkin lot(because there is a huge curb there).. and STILL did not stop, then this same car then SPUN around, missed the dumpster, and finally hit the BUILDING!!!
..my pips do you get the picture...with my analysis , my brain refused to gree,/agree that a car can backup /reverse up a huge hill.

anyway sha, one guy saw me by the car, and called the cops/popo/police, thats how as a naija girl, i started walking away, the boo refused to let me go, saying i have to wait for the police, abi this boy chop winsh,

first: i did not witness the accident=i did not see anything.
2: i did not call the cops, he did
3: the most important, i have a test at 12pm, that is the main reason i am in America
4: shoo, i dont know kem from anywhere, this is America.

..so i put my ever reliable mode of transportation, My Leg-Wagon:2006, 2.5i, in gear/drive and made damn sure i wasnt going back, wait for police ko,...wait for the police ni...

..see me se trouble, kiloshele,..early monday moring, i am waitin for police, .."hiss" when, i have better things to do.

got to run
toyintomato aka toyin-B for busy is off again off to another study session, my social life is so gone right now.
thanks for all the comments. as you can see, i am replying in the naija style..late as usual, no vex.
love toyin-T
have a great weekend/week

..abi craze is cashing this guy

..see the nonsense and concobility the email sent to me

Good Morning,

After reviewing your account we have found that you had another laptop fine on August 15, 2006 in the amount of $475.00 which was paid.
Based on this information we are not able to waive your fine of $25.00.

Thank you,
Dirk W

...toyintomato, is mad, honestly honestly , i am praying for this dirk guy, because he is testin me ,..big time.
this is what happened.

i borrowed the laptop from my library for my group meeting and i returned it 30 mins late, kappish. normaly for 20-40 minutes lateness ..the fine is waved.

this guy now sent me this email, i dont think toyintomato would pay $400 bucks for a fine(abi i chop winch)..who dashed me the money.
anyway , i told them there must have been some type of computer error, the bobo refused to gree, saying that if i can pay $400 what is $25

see me se trouble, over 20 mins lateness.he was very rude to me, which was uncalled for, abi i offended the guy somewhere.anyway i am taking it to his superior and for the first time i am considering adding racial prejudice story to my dispute.

i am actually thinking of gettin the guy fired(this is soooo unlike me) but you should have seen how the guy rubbished me on top of $25 bucks. it even remained small i wanted to vex=annoyance and pay the stupid fine.

but in all honesty, it think i am being singled out, and i do not know why????

the stupid guy just gave me a headache,
okay let me go back to bed this nonsense is depriving me of my sweet sleep

toyin-t is goin to bed,and i better not have a dream about this stupid nonsense, becos when i get to the library 2morrow i will Beg-Gi for every person there (copyright= fuji house of commotion)

UPDATE: SEPTEMBER 24TH : ALL FINES HAVE BEEN WAIVED FROM MY ACCOUNT!!!

brain freeze and another set of random gist

..hmnn, i think, i am getting used to this random gist style..(its the lazt way out of not writing whole stories)
...so what happened..

....yes, i have become fully americanized, as i was jejely walking, at the campus apartments, i saw 2 guys and a girl walking strangely..the babe was wearing her pajamas, obviously my gbeborun instincts pick up, the i heard her screaming , "you promised never to hit me"..blah blah blah, so without a sec to think i carried my phoned and called the popo aka police to report the domestic violence,hmn after i started thinkin, if i was in naija wuld i have called the police. oh well , carry go jare.

my pips, will i ever be taken seriosly..i tire oh.
so in my Options class, i was answering a lot of questions(i think the prof likes calling my name)
so anyway he asked for the answer from one of our assignments, my brain freezed big time, see me see trouble, the guy gave us 20 questions..did he think we wuld actually get to the last question..
so i resulted to naija style of classroom avoidance and removed my eye from the prof's line of vision, as i was concentrating on this mode of operation, one nonsense fly started disturbin my gloriously permed hair, so i started waving my hands to get the fly off.

the prof:" miss toyintomato, i see you have an answer for this problem"
me:"yeparipah.., am sorry prof, i do not know the answer"
prof: " so you just felt like waving your hands
me:" ehmn, prof Robin, actually there was a huge fly , hovering around my head...(by this time i was giggling so hard)

..anyway the class started laughing, and the prof forgot about the question
honestly ..honestly..this was not a planned distraction move.. although all copyright belongs to me.

..okay now i haven't heard this question in a while, so am sorry i just had to laugh
one of the ladies in my team, she is American by the way, age=35,works full time, and doin her MBA, asks me
"oh toyintomato, you speak english so well"
for a sec, confusication caught me, is this woman that dumb, anyway i just started laughing, she was looking around like she said some thing wrong.i choose not to enlighten her..heheh

...Progress in class:..(this was the email i sent to my mum..she is a lecturer and i have to fulfill this part or she will call me at 5am in the morning)

1: i totally bombed my globalization presentation, i choose to take blame,lack of preparation, one of my team members refused to meet, and did not show up until 10 mins before class.
..note to self, it really is tiring when you are teamed with up with someone who is working full time.
2: my second group is worse, first guy hasn't been in skool for 10 years, he keeps asking me questions already in the text book. gosh just read the dam text book, ..simple or tell your assistant to give you an executive summary

3: love my 3rd group, we are the team to beat, ...hahaha

on another random hopeless gist
...so as i was waiting at the bus stop,i heard a black guy speak chinese, see how surprisation caught me, i did full stop with my legs to see this with my 2 ko-ko-ro eyes.
eh, this i have to see , i did full 10 mins of non-embarrassed/lack of shame ,watching this guy converse with a Chinese guy..my goodness i was impressed.
Respecting my old age, i choose not to ask the black guy where he learn't to speak Chinese

..okay pips of to do homework, i have a couple of team meeting tomorrow, and i want to sound intelligent
later pips
love Toyintomato

On a Sad note

Rest in Peace Tosin Fuja (Nee Abatan) May 1981 - August 2007.

i just found out this news, and i have been crying ever since,

Tosin was indeed a very unique girl, her quiet soul, her smile..she was a true friend.

we both went to Model college together
and grew up together in Agege...funny we used to call ourselves the "Agege babes"...gosh!

i really dont know what to write, because my hand shaking.
my heart goes out to her family, her husband..(sigh...)

the Almighty GOD will be with your family , husband and child.

Am Backkkkkkkkkkkkkk!..random gibrish

okay, this week was crazy with a capital C, Correction K....hahah
classes have started in full force,checked out all the guys, in all my classes, no boyfriend potential yet.
Baba God , one small prayer request , pls pls let a black person be in my next class, so that i can at least go out on dates. i promise i will stop microwaving potatoes and learn how to boil potatoes..hahaha

So, i sneaked down to Manhattan , to meet my boo(shhhh!! its supposed to be a secret), lets just say i am the only person that spent the week in new york city, and never got to see times square. my people, my thighs have never ached so much, at least i went to the wax museum after drinking 2 bottles of energy drinks.and that is all i am goin to say..kappish(remember my mother is reading this)...hahaha

haba, do you want mummy toyintomato to faint!

besides that, my boo aka SBO.. commented that i am not wife material, yeparipah, ori mi oh, see me see trouble, me the one and only toyintomarro, not wife material , so i listed my skills.

1: hopeless cook
2: cant be submissive
3: loves taking charge
4: hmnnn, i really cant think of anythin else, this is sad, anyway serious headache is cashin me, so i gives up. abeg jare, i owe nobody no explanations.

anyway back to another un-important gist.
.........hmnn how old is too old, my home girl met SBO and said he is a little too old for me, that i need someone younger because i am such a playful person. anyway i tend to disagree, growing up with only my mum, i believe , that when i date i always pick older men cos , deep down i still think i am looking for a father figure, ..anyway i am sure there is a psycho-analytical word for this..but me i dont care, as long as i am happy.

my original ex boyfriend(becos i dated him for over 5 yrs) emailed me. the following events occurred:

1: nonsense technology failed me: all my address blocking and filtering on both my yahoo, hotmail and hi5 accounts all failed me and allowed his email to pass through

2: My fingers failed me: as i was about to click on spam and delete to block out the message, not me but my fingers accidentally hit open.

3: the nonsense boy, sent me a bunch of crap , how he remembers me. abeg i have moved on. am thinking he is doing a psychological game, so that i can email him and ask how he is, and he will tell me he is married....(gosh i really have to stop analyzing things..)
4: the above events put the boy on my radar, and so i had a nonsensical dream about him, to this i was totally mad.

note to self, update the filter on your email accounts, i do not want to have any contact with that boy. okay as you have already guessed, it was a bad breakup, i will give the gist in another post.

on to a berra topic.... nothing crazy has happened to me yet..ahhh , i just remembered, i was diagnosed with secondary blood pressure, these Americana doctors sha , i told them,
1: i currently have 3 classes to pass and graduate
2:i am lookin for a job
3: i am moving apartments
4:i am saving for my trip back home...hell yes! i am stressed, what else is new. Nigerians thrive and function more effectively when under stress,

Abeg Dokita , just leave me. so i refused to go back to the hospital, besides i think they just want to spend my student health insurance money..hahah. so i told them i after a good day of sleep-TV and sleep, i will be okay. kappish.

...Soo, what else, as an original T.V addict, i upgraded to 300 digital cable channels..save me!!!!, you guys can see me oh, now you can understand why my blogging activities have drastically reduced..lol

...I am supposed to be doing my homework right now, but this brain is blocked, this my brain please dont fail me, olowo ori mi, the main insurance of my whole family.....abeg brain dont give up on me now. .

there is a gist i am itching to tell you guys , but the fear of my roommate is the beginning of wisdom, BaBa God Please help me to keep my mouth shut. it is becos of this useless type of temptation that i always beg my roommate not to tell me anything about her boyfriend aka smack that. see all the prayer and fasting i am doing just to keep my lips sealed..hmnnn, i tire oh

sorries to eferybodies, toyintomarro is fery bushy, clashes is ferys ferys hards. so maybees, i wons be writes and commens all the times, pleanse doesent vex for me.

.... i tried to used good queens English through out this post, my razzyness factoria is begins to ..ehm, ehm, ....comins down..hahahahaahahahaha..(i just had to let it out)

have a great week...
love toyintomato

Air Quality Violation

Prosecutors :The American Lung Association and the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency
Defendant: Toyintomato, aka T-T, aka Toyin-T
Case: Air quality Violation

August 18, 2007: Appeals Court Denies toyintomato's case " on Air Quality violation"

Court shoots down Toyintomato's, appeal of August 2007 , ruling that the release of toxic flatulence 6 times a day violates Clean Air Act

Washington, D.C. (Aug 18, 2007) – A panel of federal judges denied appeals by Toyintomato to overturn the ruling on the quantity of flatulence released by Toyintomato.

Higher flatulence levels in a region are frequently accompanied by increased hospitalization, emergency room visits for respiratory disorders, reduction in outdoor activities and the widespread increase in the act of holding the nose.

Significantly, recognizing the harm from Toyintomato’s delay, laxity and lawlessness, the Court also “urged” her to “act promptly in promulgating a revised rule that effectuates the statutory mandate by implementing the 2 hour-hour [ozone] standard, which was deemed necessary to protect her friends, classmates, fellow bus riders and the entire public.”

Today’s decision reaffirms that Toyintomato violated the Clean Air Act by releasing flatulence in excess of the required minimum deemed sufficient for human beings.

“Toyintomato" should heed the Court’s pointed warning to act promptly to adopt protective rules that will deliver long overdue clean air to the public at large,”

The prosecution's attorney JohnBull said , this was a really hard case to prove due to the fact that most of toyintomato's farting came in the form of "silent bombs",
thankfully the toxic=stench levels matched that of toyin-t' s yarsh and that broke the case.

......furthermore Toyintomato's foot-dragging and law-breaking have a daily toll on people forced to breathe flatulence levels that doctors and scientists tell us is widely unhealthy.”
his suggested protective rules include:

1: limiting of eating of scrambled eggs to 3 times a week or less
2: total abstinence from any kind of beans possible
3: having laxative readily available to curb excessive farting.

Toyintomato's Response to all this:..."No comment!..while releasin another silent bomb..opps..lol"

(p.s..i am so sorry i haven't replied any comments or even blogg stalked in a while , i am workin like a mad person, also i am movin to a new apartment right now, and also skool starts full time on sept 3rd and i have assignments due already... in the famous words of Diana ross ..."i will survive!"..haha)

.... definition of terms :just in case you did not click on the link and haven't figured it out by now..hahah
Flatulence
1.) presence of a mixture of gases known as flatus in the digestive tract of mammals expelled from the rectum.
commonly known as 'farting', 'passing gas', 'breaking wind', 'cutting the cheese', or 'passing wind

2.)presence of gas under some degree of pressure, in a confined cubicle. The term is normally used of the presence of gas in the digestive tract of mammals, usually leaving a distinct odor

3.).)To discharge material, as vapor or fumes, usually suddenly and violently: emit, give, give forth, give off, give out,let out, release send forth.

intr.v. fart·ed, fart·ing, farts

4.)To expel intestinal gas through the anus; break wind.

5.). An often audible discharge of intestinal gas.

In 2005 Feb, a guy made me cry, 2007 August another guy made me cry...this will never happen to me again!

...hmnn usually i write funny stuff, but today is not a good day,
i am not even sure i am goin to post this lets just see as it goes, ..

most likely i will write the funny stuff next week and you can come back and read it then.
..is this goin to be lengthy, i definitely think so, will i feel better after ..who knows.

...in life , you just never know, often people harras me for not datin, sayin that i am runnin from love, ..and i explain, if love has to come with pain, then i would prefer not to love.
i am a happy person, i am usually full of life, it hurts me deeply, when someone takes pleasure in tryin to kill my zest for life. it hurts, why wuld you want to see me sad..why

..maybe its the values i was brought up with, growin up in a single parent house, my mum instilled in me the ability to be happy without a guy, havin a guy around can and shld not determine my attitude to life.God has already filled my life with joy, i don't need a guy to confirm or re validate that.

..so where shld i start from... i dont know.

this is what i know , i slept on the floor in the hotel room, i cried my self to sleep for allowin this to happen to me.he took my cell phone and credit cards, cus God knows i wuld have left that hotel without a doubt at 1 am in the mornin.
i honestly wuld have preferred he hit me, at least i can fight him back, but emotional abuse hurts, and kills me from the inside , there is no way for me to fight back.

..i know i am rambling, i guess i am still workin thru all this...dear God, my best friend, my pal, who always has my back, ........"plz dont let me cry again".

..hmnnn , after a 1 hour walk...okay my pips, am back, disregard all that mumbo jumbo , i wrote before, i have re wired my system, talked to Baba God am good, i dont hate him at all, i only feel sad for him, at least i know i will not call him again.., toyintomato is back in full force.. no more mushy jargon...bera get ready plenty hot hot gist!...commin soon


am sure by now everyone is wondering what Phd guy did, me sef i tire. anyway long post always lead to tiredication, exhuasticationlitiez, and total boredomation, i will divide the followin post into 2,

1:if you want the hilarious chicago storry..click here chicago part 2
2: for Phd guy storry..dats 4 you gbeboruns..haha, it will be the next post, click here chicago part 1.

i hope i made it easier for my blog pips.