decided to do the 7things

......i have had a lot of depressin things happening to me right , and i do not want to bore everyone, don't worry Baba God is handling it, the devil is a liar.

so i decided to join in on this meme thing , on the 7 things i do

1: i love to take long walks, i can do this forever, just walking, and walking and walkin. thats my own version of crack, it clears my head so much...

2:i put my hands in my hair a lot, so by the end of the day hair always looks so crazy and messed up ,true ... lol, i really dont care. its kinda relaxing and massaging for me

3: i love to cook, but i always tell guys i cant cook to save my life, this is a result of past experience,one of my ex boyfriends practically turned me into his personal chef, and even lists my cooking as my qualification as his girl, so i decided never again to cook for a guy,now i find it cute when guys cook for me...hmnnn now thats sexy

4: i dont date guys that am taller than, which kinda narrows the dating pool for me, eh stupid rule ..right

5: i have have huge crushes on Asian men, their hair is soooooo adorable.but for naija guys i love the "bald look" ..yummy chocolate muffin stud!

6: i am smarter than i often let on. this was instilled in my early years by my mum saying " tsumani...tone it down, you are not supposed to let a man know you are intelligent" before i used to get mad at this, but now i have embrace it, cos pple will underestimate you, and you can strategize..get it

7: am really not a huge clubbin fan, i would rather prefer, cuddling up at home and watch a good movie. kappish...guys take note all that dinnin out , movie theater, club hoppin is really 2 much,

am also soccer junkie..haha, officially am a Man U fan, sorry all you arsenal pips...boooo hoo , Man U 4 LIFE, and we are risin again......hahahaha
(p.s i look so cute in my jersey)

oky i cheated i decided to change it to 10 things..haha

8: i actually got admitted for Bsc in Fine Arts, but went for a career in finance instead..haha my mum was not having the "crowned princess aka first born " of the family go down that lane..haha, this girl got to have some earning potential.

9:i am addicted to cyber stalking naija bloggsites....am sure am not the only one , doin this ..lol

10: i really want to go back home, i miss Lagos 4 sure.

...late again to work

me am tired , this is the 3rd time i am wakin up at 7:35am , i have decided to conduct a studious and lengthy research about this, and as usual i visit the glorious and knowledgeable www.oprah .com for any information on sleep deprivation
1: i read that i should have a hot shower before i sleep to lower my body temperature..p.s will surely try this tonight.
meanwhile i am thinking, maybe it is this stupid satin sheets that is on my bed causing this wahala of sleep deprivation. don't ask why i bought the stupid sheets anyway its a long story,the person that fixes my hair said i should be sleepin with a satin pillow, all to save this my hair,so i went shoppin and the rest is history , i bought satin sheets , pillows and even a nitegown to match...you never know when mr right might pop along..haha am kiddin myself

anyway i went all natural to work today, no time to straighten my hair. this my office pips they never seem to amaze me, anyway as usual all the white people said my hair looks fantastic..i should leave it like that...no way tofiapa,WRONG! ,bring my nappy head to work and look unprofessional, dont you kno that straighten hair is a viewed as a reflection of your sophistication.

anyway finally flirted with the mail guy, he was voted unanimously as the cutest guy ever, by all the single and cute girls in the office, and as usual i volunteered aka was voted to tell the boy, me and my big mouth, at least he said all of us were cute too including me .haha blushing with my naija blackness...ori mi o, my head is swelling big time

still checkin my yahoo email, still no email of job offer, i really want this job, and i was so sure i got the job, haba the interview guy and i did the golf lingo, and he even said he will get in touch with me 2nd week in june, still no email, abi the guy did a fast one on me.i want this sooooo bad, oya i am assignin Baba God on this mission of removing all the kontoknoto disturbing this new job.
...dont worry i will send a polite email,to confirm if i am still in the runnin for the job, abi they have decided to drop me like a hot potato, i tire oh

anyway have to go for a workshop organized by my skool for international students..oh God plz help me to keep my big mouth shut and not raise any questions that will make people uncomfortable ..the are some of my examples
1: why has the admission ratio of African students dropped rapidly , ratio of 2 africans for every class
2: what measures are in place to assist Africans who are being exploited by employers.e.g benefits ,social security taxes..and so on

..on another note...the guys in the office took a picture and put it on the wall, i know for a fact that everyone was waiting for me to comment,fellow bloggers i was strong, i kept my mouth shut , all i said was frank's head was "sweaty" kappish. i am growing wiser with my words with each day
but truthfully the picture was hilarious , all the guys posing like they were correct people and the had the guts to put it on the wall.
i trustfully felt shamed for them ...why
one of the guys rolled up his sleeves to show his tattoo, so 90's, olodo
the second guy went to stand beside his tall friends, showing of his acute shortness, orombo
another guy just looked comical
my oga , is another case, at least he wore sunglasses.
then the other guy had sweat dripping down his shaved head(not that am complaining , i have a thing for baldies)but this guy's sweat was drippin..drip! drip! drip!..lol
p.s
am not being bitchy, just truthfull, i am a strong supporter of the value of a honest opinion no bullshit, as long as its not vindictive am cool.
and that was my day in a nutshell.

..blogville idols...go and vote

..everyone needs to visit that page and vote
just clink on this link //blogvillepopidols.blogspot.com/
i will post all my comments later, i gotta run, i haven't finished listenin to all the contestants

but why,....4 hours in church!

...this lockdown thing on no dating untill november is really gettin to me. am tryong not to be 2 explicit here, but all i can say is that, i had a dream and i raped a guy, utterly ridiculous, i have to find something to fill my mind...an empty mind is the devils workshop
..went to my roomate's church, it was soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo long, goodness gracious from 11am -4pm, kilode.
me am used to my regular white baptist church, service 10 am, 10:30 announcements/testimony, 11-11:45 sermon, 11:45-12pm prayer
12pm we all go home kapish
but noooooooooo, this black church tire me, 11 am bible study, 11:30, 12pm, 12:30 1pm still testimony and announcements, , by now my hunger is becoming life life am thinking when exactly is this sermon goin to start.
finally 1:30 the sermon starts, you should have seen me, am lookin at all the doors for a quick way of escape, i would have gone , but i remembered the church is right inside downtown, translation plenty sketchy people walkin on the streets. no way toyin tomato is gonna go down in a drive by shootin, so i stay in the church am maintain my hunger
2:30pm now sleep is callin, this is the sleep that i know for sure i will not wake up, even if the pastor shouts "amen"so i finally decide to write my grocery list, i finished that in 2 mins.
this pastor has still not finished, yepa!
finally the service is over and i hear that there is food downstairs , perfecto!, then they announce again that there is a workshop after the lunch .you trust me, i just signaled my roommate that i am cuttin out after the lunch, no workshop for me, thank you.
i no, dont tell me , i am already americanized, becos am complainin about how long church was, dont worry thats why i kno i wont last a week at the redeemed in my area.
how come nothing funny is happening to me, i think the blogging thin is ruining my mojo..haha

...Am Back

sorry for being MIA, its such a long story, anyway where do i start from,

first of all,i just found out i am taking the class of Prof L/"worst professor" next fall, me and this guy have had so much drama, even my dean knows about this, but the funny thing is that i did not cos the drama , it as usual me and my "gbeborun" mouth that always puts me in trouble, but am not sorry, its is the yoruba part of me, that makes me put my mouth in everyone's biz ness even if its not my concern
...okay here is the conversation. my first interaction with the"worst prof"

location: 6pm, 1st day of ...securities and investment class

worst prof: welcome class, blah blah blah, introduction story, then he practically lists all his achievements, 2 masters, 2 different PHD's , written 12 books on investment, on the board of this and that, governin council of the CFA(chartered financial analyst)like CPA,and so on, by now i was so bored,this guy was bullshitin 2 much , then he stated authoritatively "i am more intelligent than the average American"

me/toyintomato: hehe, kilari, kiloshele, inteligent kini, what this did guy just say..what! more intelligent,intelligent ko, intelligent ni, so i smiled and raised up my hand, and calmly said.."excuse me prof, i tend to disagree with that statement, what measurement did you use to reach that conclusion"...dont even ask i kno, what is my own with defending Americans, am i not Nigerian,

worst prof: his reply, the average American does not study higher than high skool, writes no less than 1 book, blah blah blah.

then me: i said, am sorry that isnt a valid conclusion, cos there is no standardized study of the average American intelligence...by now, i kno i should i have just shut up my mouth, but nooooooooooo, my yorubaness had to show itself, in full force..the original busybody.

worst prof: he said, do you know, how many boards i sit on, blah blah blah

me/toyintomato:..then i said..you know, it is more plausible to state that you might me more intelligent than the average American only in areas related to the finance industry.

worst prof: he smiled and said"i will remember you"

..and thats when all the palava/drama started, he picked on me in class, to answer questions all the time, it got so bad, that i had to tell my adviser, that i wanted to switch classes, that i was scared he might be biased in his grading,
anyway..from that period, the guy and i have had problems,
so now am taking him again this fall, so i got all the text books he uses, and i am reading like a mug.
cuz i know the guy is so goin to pick on me, so i want to be prepared.
and thats is the long version of why i have been Mia..missin in action, but am back..

documented effects of alcohol and me

first.. of all a big thanks to all the comments, i will try to reply to most of the comments.(i am still figuring out how to do that..haha, u know i am slow when it comes to computer things)

....yesterday, it was so hot,i took a power nap at 5:30pm and eventually woke up at 9pm, so obviously i wont be able to go back to bed..
i called everyone i knew, about suggestions on things to do that will make me fall asleep.
here is the list of the suggestions...
1:my pal , said i should drink hot cocoa..i did not work.
2: heard i should watch a boring movie ..dat also failed.
3:i even tried random reading of blogs..i was still awake
4: heard i should eat till am stuffed, had pancakes, potatoes, pasta aka spagetti..i only ended up in the toilet...now its 2am , no sleep yet
5:read my most boring text book, which has never failed to knock me out, i calculated all the formulas on hedge fund strategies, option pricing analysis...etc ....i still didn't fall asleep
6: went thru my phone,called my ex-booty call, he did not pick up.....yeye boy.
7:counted sheep..lol , like that ever worked,.... abeg, i stopped counting at 85,495sheeps

..then my fantastic roommate suggested, i drink a Smirnoff(beer), because i will surely fall asleep..this is the story behind that

.....my dad, is a correct drinker, he can drink from "officially 12pm at work" to 9pm at a beer parlor. no form of alcohol is safe from him...big stout aka odeku to star..aka sunshine,jony walker and even paraga and still be okay to drive back home, have an intelligent conversation with a police man,argue that badagry pips are the original lagosians and not isale eko pips,do my homework with me and still show no effects of alcohol.
...but nooooooooooooooo, of all the things he should pass down to me, he failed me at that. if i should take a sip, of anything alcoholic, i start acting like am on some serious alabukun overdose
below the 10 things i usually do, when i take a sip of alcohol
1: slurring on my words
2: shouting and ask everyone around if i am shouting
3: flirt with everyone in sight even girls
4: dance like there is no 2morrow, even if the music is not playing
5: try to have an intelligent conversation on determining the sex of ants, and its relation to political tension in Nigeria
6: discuss "with myself" which African president is the Most ugly...........any suggestions
7:talk with anyone who cares to listen, on how if you swim from Boston you will eventually get to the beach in Lagos
8:eventually start doing a strip tease.....i dont believe this, but my friends have a video tape they promised to use when i become the Nigerian finance minister.
9: throw up everything i have ever eaten in the past year, ranging from amala and efo riro to my Chinese vegetable fried rice.
10; and Finally i pass out and cant remember shit when i wake up

so it was with so much disappointment that i finally realized, my dad did not pass on his alcohol tolerance trait to me...
with all the past documented alcoholic related events of my 26 years of living, i made a mental note to myself..not one sip of alcohol, even if someone calls me an egbe,slacker, or a party pooper. i am usually on a natural high, i dont need alcohol to make me "higher"...
say no to peer pressure, yeah rite, who am i kiddin...lol

....with the known effects of alcohol and me, my roommate suggested i drink a beer to fall asleep,i drank just a little bottle, and as usually, i banged on her door, made an ass of myself and fell asleep..finally!.

..its 7:10 am i cant wake up, i have a hangover, i cant feel my legs, i feel so slow, am i ever gonna get to work today...i hit the snooze button again, its 7:24am, there is no hope 4 me..the devil is a liar!, over my dead body tofiapa , i will not ruin my perfect resumtion time of 7:55am sharp nigerian time...
so i did not go to work, i called in sick today, so i have to go in to work 2morrow/Saturday to finish my projects...i am definitely not happy about this...no clubbin, no hanging out, this friday sucks..
...moral of today, try , try and try again, i am still trying hard, to beat the effects of alcohol and me, i will survive, am i not the daughter of my father.."i have dream that one day, i will drink alcohol , and will not make an ass of my self, and not even have a hangover the next day, but for today all i can drink is "coke on ice"

i have no life insurance...yepa!

...why did this occur to me.
i drive a golf cart at work to get from one buildin to another, becos all the buildings are spaced far apart.
anyway , one of the golf carts had axle damage and had to be repaired, so i offered to pair up and share my cart with my co-worker aka the new girl.
dats when palava happened, she offered to drive, i gave her the keys, then kata-kata burst.
she was driving like she was on crack, we were all over the place, she couldnt control the steerin, did i mention she also was driving with one hand, also she never used the brakes,she never stopped at stop signs, cars were screeching to avoid hitting us.

..my life flashed before me, who is gonna inherit my shoe collection, what about my expensive ass text books, i still havent watched ocean's 13 teen, commin out soon...am i goin to die in a stupid golf cart, and it dawned on me, i dont have a life insurance policy.

anyway i calmly smiled and told her, to please take me back to the main office buildin that i forgot somethin, i ran to my boss, and screamed that why was i paired with .."an accident waiting to happen",she then told me the new girl dosent have a drivers liscence.

...ori mi o ( my head oh) this woman wants to kill me, i am surely gonna die today 4 sure.my boss then said i should teach the new girl some pointers on how to drive, ..my reply "no way in hell".
i told them i am goin to walk to all the buildings, i went to ife, walking is our life,i walked from moz hall to class, from moremi hall to pharmacy dept... i can even walk to mountain Kilimanjaro if the need be.
..soo the moral of the story, i carefully avoided the new girl and her driving skills, i walked thru out today, i now have sunburn, cuz i did not use sunscreen.
but i am happy i am the first child of my family, the crown jewel, i am not prepared to die now, and besides i dont even have a life insurance policy, typical naija mentality..hahahahahah....rolling on floor

p.s...its not that i did not want to help the new girl out, the girl really was a difficult person, and i did not want to deal with her, there is also a bunch of liabilty crap from my job, if shit happens to the golf cart while i am teachin her to drive.
besides also this is America, everyman for himself, i aint her family, ...shooooo